In the past 10 days I’ve solo packed up many of my belongings and readied my home to leave it for 4.5 months, drove a total of 1498 miles, slept in 7 different beds, held the hand of my beloved aunt as she passed, navigated some challenging family dynamics, and had some truly beautiful and deeply meaningful moments with the people I love most. As my aunt said on the day she died, in what may go down as the biggest understatement in history, “It’s been a day!” In the blur of it all, I ate some carbs and even some sugar. I forgot electrolytes at one point and had leg cramps. But overall I did very well in the eating dept. I even planned and made 4 Keto meals for the whole big family. I took walks up mountain roads and along seaside wharfs, smelled lilacs, and watched my sweet little niece and nephew as they watched wide-eyed as ducklings hatched. @Carrie E. checked in and helped me laugh. My body feels rough, but not as bad as it did on a normal day getting out of bed a year ago before I started my low carb journey. I’m deeply grateful that I had the daily energy and the long haul stamina to do all this, the clarity of mind so I could be present with all that came, and the strategies in place to stay mostly on program. @Amy Eiges checked in and helped me think through the aftermath and prepare for the cravings that may storm in once I finally get into my summer rental house on Tues and the cortisol dissipates. Grief is a strange business, so I know things may ripple and wiggle this summer. But so grateful for the tools and the community here. I’ve followed in my aunt’s footsteps with isolation and food addiction for much of my life, but it is time to pick a different fork in the path… she wanted that for me and I want it for myself, to be a fully robustly living and loving legacy of the most beautiful kind. As my movie buff cousin quoted “It’s time to get busy living or get busy dying.” (Shawshank Redemption). I’m choosing to release myself from the prison of my own making and get busy living! Thank you for a lifetime of love and inspiration, Aunt Anita!

Posted by Kara C at 2023-05-28 10:50:44 UTC